You will find it so easy!! was the phrase I heard the most when talking to people about being a parent. I have worked in childcare now for around 6 years, but before that I helped at my dance school with the little ones, so I have had a lot to do with children. So people made the assumption that I would find being a parent a walk in the park.
What I think people forgot to think about is that I had never taken a child home, had to do night feeds, knowing when to up their milk or just generally looking after a child that is my own. In fact I have found it to be completely different from looking after children at work. The one thing that I think about a lot is what ever I do with Ava will determine the person she will grow up to be ( I have never had that full responsibility before !).
So no I haven’t found it easy there has been days where I have found it hard like the other day Ava cried for most of the day and I didn’t know what she wanted ( I did feel like a failure, I mean what mommy am I if I don’t know what she needs ). After I had sat down and calmed down a bit we had a big snuggle and she was fine for a little bit ( we think she is teething ) !!. Seeing her little smile just melts my heart it is amazing !!.
So I may know more than some first time mom’s like how to make a bottle or how to change a nappy ( nothing you couldn’t work out yourself or read in a book), But this doesn’t make you a good parent a good parent is someone that cares and loves this little human no matter if they have pooed all over you again !! or screaming at the top of their lungs !!.
So its not easy but that’s ok I’m not a failing mommy I’m just a mommy learning and probably will be learning new things about her until I am grey and old !.